dating, thoughts, tips
5 MUSTS when on a date : Be easy. No. Not in that way! + Body Language5:58:00 PM
|article via she.yahoo.com|
This post was actually inspired by a friend :) who's going out on a date today, and it got me thinking what usually happens so you don't end up wanting to split the bill and run the f*** home?
No, not in that way. Research says you should try to act available on a date instead of playing hard to get. Unless you're on a blind date, it's clear you both like each other, otherwise why would you have agreed to go out? Secondly, playing hard to get doesn't actually work. It is thought that we find people attractive when they are hard for everyone else to get, but love the fact that they are easy for us to have.
Therefore on your date, if someone asks you to dance or offers to buy you a drink, politely say no and give all your attention to your date. Make them aware that you're a catch, but remind them that they are the one who has caught you.
Talk about yourself
The conversation aspect of a date is scary. The thought of awkward pauses and ugly silences is enough to make anyone's stomach churn like a washing machine. Don't run off to a nunnery yet though. An easy conversation to have is one that focuses on you. Talk about your past, where you grew up or where you studied. Discussing your background will not only point to values that are important to you, it will also indicate to your date the potential you have to be a long-term partner.
Researchers found that the most stable relationships were built by people who had similar backgrounds and similar attitudes. Avoid talking about yourself too much though, this is one of the biggest dating no-no's. Instead, once you've talked about your hometown, ask them where they first lived, or their terrible teenage fashion.
Dress to impress
Admittedly what you look like is important, but really it's not what you wear that counts, but how you wear it. When we decide who we fancy, body language and tone of voice are key players. So don't fret about how you look. The key to a good outfit is one that improves your body language. Make sure the clothes you choose fit, are comfortable and practical.
There are a few little tricks you can use that may help your dating success too. Firstly, ladies if you want a second date leave your neck and your wrists bare. For both guys and girls, avoid wearing strong perfume (but do take a bath!). Smell is intrinsic to dating and they need a whiff of your natural scent.
Show them that you like them
We all know body language is hugely important when dating, so use it to show your date you like them. Not only will this make them feel great, you'll be able to judge quickly if they like you back. Women have 52 signals that tell men they're keen, whilst guys only have 10.
Ladies if you want to give him a clear message, tilt your neck to the side, lock eyes with him and touch his forearm. Although cheesy, you can also subtly lick your lips. For the guys, pay attention to how you look. Checking your shirt is straight and your jacket neat may sound odd, but preening yourself is a clear indicator that you care about the girl you're with. Also while you're listening to your date, slightly raise your eyebrows, it shows you're really interested in what she is talking about.
You've been wined, you've been dined and now it may be time for a cheeky smooch. The first kiss is a deal maker or breaker for most so getting it right is important. Remember to vary your speed. Start off slowly, and then build pace before easing off again. Our lips, mouths and tongues are highly sensitive so make the most of the kiss and try new things. They'll think you're a kissing guru.